Two posts in one day! Wow. What is happening over here that is allowing me to post not once but TWICE today! This hardly (if ever) has happened before. So why did I feel the need to blog more than once today (as if I need a reason, it is my blog after all) well, Kurt is out for a run, Nate is fast asleep in his crib, and I’m sitting on the couch watching baseball and looking through pictures on our laptop. Then it hits me. Today is October 6th 2015. In 20 days my itty bitty baby will be ONE! There is only 20 days left before it’ll be his birthday. To say this year has gone by incredibly fast would be an understatement. This year was an absolute blur. I still don’t fully believe this year even happened. I swear I will wake up tomorrow morning still pregnant and eagerly anticipating Nate’s arrival. But alas, that is not the case. Tomorrow I will wake up super early [like usual] but will be heading out the door to my other place of employment and Nate will spend the day with his Nana Lori (my mom).

Gosh. In 20 days I will have a one year old. In 20 days we can classify him as a toddler. In 20 days he will be exuding even more confidence and independence. In 20 days he won’t need me [as much]. In 20 days I won’t have any more monthly pictures to upload. In 20 days my boy will get to eat his very own birthday cake. In 20 days it feels like everything is going to change and nothing will be the same. In 20 days I might need to curl into a ball and cry hysterically for an hour (or longer).

Nate will be one in 20 days. Someone pinch me and wake me up please?! I’m not ready for this infant stage to be over yet! If I close my eyes really tight, I can still picture every little detail about the day he was born. What the weather was like outside, how Nate smelled, the names of the nurses who saw us, the [crappy] hospital food we ate. Everything. And if I keep my eyes tightly closed, I can trick myself into believing that it was only yesterday.

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